Grief and Love
by HappyMollyWeasley
Summary: Harry and Ginny finally get some time together after the battle.


'So, this is it,' he thought. "It is finally over.' He was dead tired and even though thoughts were rushing through his head he was convinced that he needed to sleep and sleep for ages. Ron and Hermione had headed back to the Great Hall, but he had gone up to his old dormitory. He had a quick shower and a well needed shave, and then he passed out on his old bed.

'We need to get going,' Mrs Weasley said as the first spring sunshine fell through the magical ceiling of the Great Hall. Her voice was somehow empty, but at least she seemed to be able to hold herself together for the time being. Mr Weasley was sobbing and clinging on to Charlie. George had the most hollow gaze Ginny had ever seen from a human being. It hurt her to see her family like this. It hurt her to see their pain, and to feel her own pain. And yet she felt that her own feelings were so confusing. She was of course grieving her dead brother, but at the same time she felt a light happy feeling of a new, unexpected future. Harry had lived. He was alive. He was alive, and how could she cry when he was alive? Only hours before she had thought he was dead. It was like she would never see the sunshine again. Like a kiss of a dementor. And yet, she saw the first morning sunshine now.

'We need to go home,' Mrs Weasley said to her family once again.

Ron put his arm around Hermione and said:'Come on, let's go home.' Hermione leaned into him and whispered that maybe his family needed their space. They were in grief and needed to be just family.

'No,' he said. 'please come. I need you.' He held her tightly and turned to his mother. 'Hermione can come too, can't she?'

'Of course dear,' Mrs Weasley said and smiled at them. 'Of course you will. Now come on!'

'Where is Harry?' Ginny asked. 'We can't go without Harry!'

'We know you like him, we all do,' Bill said, 'but Mum's right. We should go home now. We haven't seen him for over an hour. He probably has lots of things to do and people to see. We'll catch up with him later.'

'No,' Ginny said. 'I am not leaving without him.'

Mrs Weasley smiled weakly.

'Darling, I know that you have always liked him… But we don't know what he feels right now, and we need to get back to the Burrow. Look at your father!' she said and glanced at her husband who didn't seem to register what happened around him. He was just crying and his face looked like an old man's face.

'OK, then you go and I stay. I am staying whatever you say. Nobody can stop me now. You tried to stop me from fighting earlier, but you couldn't do that either!' She walked away, angrily. Hermione was running after her.

'I'll stay with them,' Ron told his family. 'You go home now, and we will follow later.' He hugged his mother and his sobbing father. After some hesitation the rest of the Weasley family went home.

Ron found Ginny and Hermione sitting together in a corner of the Great Hall. Ginny was sobbing onto Hermione's shoulder. Hermione was talking to her in a soft comforting voice. Ron was suddenly filled of tender emotion watching his sister and his girl… Was she really his girlfriend? He hasn't had the time to think about it yet. He saw his sister and his girlfriend, and they were both alive. He felt grateful and he walked over to them and held them both.

'Do you think he stopped caring about me?' Ginny asked after a while.

'Are you mad?' Ron said rolling his eyes.

'Don't you worry,' Hermione said. 'He loves you, you know.'

'He does?' Ginny lifted her head and looked at Hermione.

'He does. You know that too, don't you?' Hermione said. Ginny said nothing to this.

'Let's go find him!' Hermione said.

They went up to the Gryffindor Tower, which wasn't as damaged as they had expected. Ron found Harry sleeping and went down to the common room where the girls were waiting. He sat down with them and put his arm around Hermione.

'Now how about you? When did you two finally get together?' Ginny asked with a knowing look at her brother and Hermione. Ron's face reddened.

'Yesterday. In the middle of the battle,' he mumbled and Ginny laughed as Ron was kissing Hermione's cheek.

'Well, I think I need a shower and some rest,' Ginny smiled and winked at them. 'Good night, you two,' she said and walked up to the girls' dormitory. She heard Hermione giggle and saw in the corner of her eye that Ron and Hermione were kissing when she were climbing the stairs.

When Ginny came back to the common room half an hour later she found Ron and Hermione at sleep together on a couch. She smiled to herself and went up to the boys' dormitory. She hadn't been up there since… No, she didn't want to think about that right now… it was enough thoughts in her head already. She felt a bit ashamed to walk into Harry´s room, and yet she felts that it was the right thing to do. She bent over him and looked at his face, and she heard him mumble something in his sleep.

'How beautiful he is,' she thought. And how thin he had become! Ginny conjured a chair and sat down. She took his hand and watched him sleep. She didn't mind or even notice the tears running down her cheeks. The minutes passed, she didn't care about the time, but suddenly she felt extremely dizzy and exhausted. Then, after some hesitation, she lay down beside him. She could feel her heart beating madly as she laid there and just felt his presence. It felt so good, and so right, and she sighed happily and fell to sleep.

Harry was dreaming. He had been dreaming all kinds of scary nightmares since he fell asleep. Now this dream was different. He dreamt about a field of flowers. It seemed so real and he could distinguish every single flower. He could tell from the flowers' fragrance that there were no evil left in the world, and he felt utterly happy. And suddenly Ginny was in the field and he was hugging her, kissing her intensely, holding her and telling her how much he loved her. He has his hand in her beautiful hair and the field are suddenly spinning around him and he is flying without a broom…

Harry woke up, and the scent of the flowers was still present. He hadn't opened his eyes yet, but he could feel something tickling his nose. He opened his eyes and was amazed to find Ginny in his arms. Her sweet-smelling hair tickled his face but he didn't move. How could he possibly move when she was finally in his arms? He didn't know how it happened, yet his dream had come true. He felt that she was still asleep and he just watched her.

'How did this happen?' he thought, amazed. He could feel her breathing, and he knew this was for real. Unbelievable, but still for real. He felt happy, and unexpectedly he started sobbing. All those tears which had been waiting for so long, for years, really, were suddenly falling. He cried quietly at first, then sobbing, and finally he cried loudly. Ginny woke up and just held him. They held each other and they both cried for a long time. And then, with their faces red from crying, they started to kiss. Slowly, softly at first, and then more hungrily.

'I thought you died yesterday' Ginny said when they stopped to get some air.

'I thought so too,' he replied. 'I thought that I was going to die, and the last thing I thought of was you. I think that I did die. Well, anyway, I was thinking of you, and… ' He trailed off and looked into her eyes. He had so much to tell her, but perhaps this wasn't the moment for that.

And somehow they dozed off again. The next thing Ginny knew was her brother barking in.

'What?' Ron said. She gave him a threatening look and he grinned and shrugged.

'Do you want some breakfast?'

They ate in the Great Hall. It was so different from the hundreds of times they had breakfast there before. And yet, it was the same pumpkin juice, toast and eggs. The same Gryffindor table. The same friends… No, not the same friends. There were so many missing. Ginny was wondering if the rest of her life would feel like this. Would it feel so confused, like living and loving and grieving simultaneously? She pressed Harry's hand and felt him squeeze back. It was somehow reassuring.

'Are we on our way, then?' Ron was asking as he shovelled his last piece of his fourth helping of bacon into his mouth.

'Where?' Harry said, looking confused.

'Home, you silly prat!' Ginny said and kissed his cheek. He smiled and then sought Hermione's eyes, a question hanging in the air.

'Yeah, you too, Harry. Why do you think all of us stayed here last night, looking for you?' Hermione sighed.

Harry gave them a sheepish look and smiled. Ginny found this most charming and kissed him fully on the mouth. She was half expecting Ron to protest, but he didn't seem to mind at all.

'Somehow Ron had grown up a bit last year,' Ginny thought. 'But didn't we all?'

They walked outside the grounds of Hogwarts and then Apparated to the Burrow. Harry held Ginny tightly and smelled her hair as he Apparated them both. He thought of all those times during the last year he had Apparated, and how much different this was. How enjoyable this really was… Well, that was until they arrived outside the Burrow and Ginny, who wasn't used to Apparation felt sick and had to throw up. Hermione took care of her and cast a few spells to freshen her up.

Harry noticed how silent the Burrow was as they walked through the front door. This home was usually not a particular quiet one. He had felt so wonderfully light headed the past hours, and now reality hit him again. How was he thinking, intruding on a family who had lost a son? Maybe he should leave right now? But Ginny was holding his hand and pushing him forwards. And then Mrs Weasley caught them both in one of her bone crushing hugs, and he felt that he was at home; he was part of this family. And suddenly he cried again. So did Molly, Ginny and the others. They cried, and they held each other. After quite some time Mrs Weasley excused herself and started to make tea. Mr Weasley were nowhere to be seen, nor was the rest of the family.

Ginny went to help her mother in the kitchen. She asked about her father, and Molly told her that both he and George was passed out of a dreamless sleep potion, and had been so since last night. Ginny was a bit worried by this, but her mother calmed her.

'Everyone has different ways to deal with this… I know Arthur, he needs to sleep now. I have to be strong for now.,' she said with a trembling voice and tears glistening in her eyes. Ginny went over to her mother and they held each other for a while.

'You found him, then,' Molly said, trying to sound cheerful.

'I did.' Ginny had to smile at this. Her mother looked at her with warmth.

'I am so happy for you. And for him. For both of you.' She hugged her daughter again, tears streaming down her face once again.

When Ginny returned to the living room she found Bill, Fleur, Percy and Charlie together with Harry. Ron and Hermione had disappeared somewhere. She noticed that Harry was looking a bit nervous. She guessed that he was worrying that her brothers wouldn't approve of them dating. Ginny smiled reassuringly to him. There was no way her brothers would protest about Harry, the Boy Who Lived, the Wizard Who Killed You-know-who… But wasn't it typical for Harry to worry about her brothers' reactions?

Ginny walked through the room towards Harry. She saw Fleur smile and whisper something to Bill who looked at Ginny and frowned. Ginny gave Harry a kiss on his cheek and sat down. She took his hand and smiled at her brothers. Percy looked quite surprised, Bill was smiling, and Charlie blurted:

'What?'

Ginny could feel Harry freeze beside her. She caressed his hand and turned her now blazing eyes towards Charlie:

'What do you mean?'

'Is this something everybody but me already knows?' Charlie asked.

Harry looked alarmed, but Ginny just climbed into his lap and said that, no. probably not everyone knew yet, but that was soon to be changed. Charlie just smiled at this:

'It is just that I haven't got used to the idea of you growing up… Well, I just have to get used to it, right?'

Ginny only mumbled something under her breath to this.

The family just sat there most of the day. They talked a bit, cried and just sat quietly. Hermione and Ron joined them later that afternoon. Then the older brothers noticed them being a couple too.

'What!' Charlie said again, looking just as surprised as earlier. 'When did this happen?'

'Well…Er… Well, yesterday, actually…' Ron stammered.

'Yesterday?' Charlie asked

'Yeah,' Harry said 'Right in the middle of the battle,' he added and described how he had to convince them to stop snogging because of the war which was going on. Everybody laughed at this, probably a bit more than necessary. It felt so good to laugh together again and yet weird. How could it be laughter in a world there so many innocent people had died? How could it be laughter then Fred was gone. And then Harry saw Fred and ceased laughing. Fred was coming into the room. It took a few seconds before Harry realised that it wasn't Fred, but George.

'What's the joke?' he asked, and Harry could see how hard he tried to keep up appearances.

'Well, not only has our only sister all of a sudden become the chosen one of the chosen one, but we have just been told that our youngest brother finally made a move on Hermione in the middle of the fight yesterday,' Bill said.

'About time, then,' George said. 'We saw that coming, didn't we…? I mean… I… We…' he trailed off. The laughter stopped. Ginny got up and hugged her brother, and they cried together. Molly stood up and held them both.

Harry left the room quietly and went outside, not because he felt left out, but because he felt that he needed space. He tried once again not to feel guilty about Fred dying. Part of him understood that it wasn't his fault at all, and yet part of him couldn't get rid of that thought. He stood there in the garden for some time, watching the birds fly over the evening sky when he heard Hermione call his name. She gave him a short hug.

'What a strange day, don't you think?' she asked. He just nodded.

'You don't blame yourself, do you?' she added, looking concerned.

'Not all the time,' Harry answered truthfully. Hermione smiled at this and hugged him again.

'Hey! Keep your hands off my girl, will you?' Ron shouted. Harry backed off quickly, but he could see Ron laughing. Hermione went inside with Ron but Harry stayed behind.

Harry stayed in the garden for a while and then went inside. He brushed his teeth and was heading upstairs to go to sleep when he passed Ginny's door. He just had to say good night to her, naturally. He knocked quietly on her door and had to take a deep breath when he saw Ginny in her nightgown with her hair hanging loosely around her shoulders. She was more beautiful than ever. He suddenly remembered the last time, the only time, he had been in her room before. Maybe she did to? And suddenly she was in his arms again, kissing him, and yes, it was blissful oblivion again. Time didn't exist anymore, nothing existed but her.

He didn't know how much later it was then they heard a knock on the door. Harry flew up from her bed (When did they get there?) and tried to straighten his cloths. Was it Mrs Weasley? Hermione opened the door and Harry gave her a sheepish smile. He kissed Ginny one last good night and went upstairs to Ron's room. Ron was sitting by the open window with a dreamy expression which reminded Harry of that love potion disaster a few years ago.

'Dreaming of Romilda, are you?' Harry playfully asked.

'Better up!' Ron answered with a goofy smile. Harry smiled and climbed into his bed. He didn't feel like sleeping yet. He thought of Ginny and felt himself blushing when he thought of how heated things had got just a few minutes ago. Maybe it had been for the best that Hermione had interrupted them in time…? He sighed and stared into the ceiling.

'Did you say anything?' Ron mumbled half asleep.

'No… Well, good night then,' Harry said and continued to happily stare at the ceiling.

Harry had a good night's sleep, with surprisingly few nightmares. Ginny greeted him with a sleepy kiss in the kitchen just before breakfast. Molly caught Harry's eye and smiled warmly towards him.

'So,' Charlie said, looking from Harry and Ginny to Ron and Hermione. 'I kind of wonder who slept in whose room last night…?'

'We didn't, we did nothing. I mean we just slept… I mean we all slept in our own beds, I promise!' Ron rapidly said, blushing worse than ever.

'Of course they did!' Molly said firmly. Harry didn't know where to look.

Charlie chuckled and Hermione quickly tried to change subject. Ginny, of course, was the only one who could out up an innocent face and look her mother in her eyes.

Arthur came down later that morning when they were sitting in the living room. He looked greyish and hollow-eyed. Ginny was nestled up cosily in Harry's lap. Arthur gave Hermione and Ron a weak smile when he noticed that they were holding hands, and stroke Ginny's cheek briefly before sitting down in his armchair, staring in front of him.

Harry sat there, thinking. He had so much on his mind, and was filled of so many emotions simultaneously. Yes, he was sad, and how could he anything but sad when he saw the worn and tired face of Mr Weasley. And he saw Ron and Hermione sitting there holding hands, and how could he not be happy for them? And Ginny. He had Ginny, alive, warm and caring. He buried his face in her hair and inhaled her flowery scent. He had Ginny and he felt like flying when he thought about her. Everything just had to become all right then.


End file.
